Closest Comparison

London Day -- My best attempt to express the mixture of feelings is by way of analogy. Three years ago I joined the Wind Ensemble, not entirely confident in my playing but more so excited to see where the group would take me. The group took me to Orchestra Hall--my first time there. I vividly remember approaching the stage doors, walking out on stage, dodging percussion equipment, trying to find the best route without tripping, and making sure I didn't knock music over. That's the visible me finding my seat on the OH stage. Here's my thought process, best respresented as a checklist:
First: (approaching stage door) "Oh, no. Do I still have all my music?"
Second: (approaching stage door, still) "Bow-tie. Check. Fly zipped. Check. Shoes tied. Check."
Third: (going through stage door) "Don't trip. Don't trip. Don't trip."
Fourth: (back toward audience) Fake smile at someone.
Fifth: (back toward audience) Check for third time to make sure phone is not on me.
Sixth: (sitting down) "Everyone can see me, but I can't see anyone"
Seventh: (standing to welcome conductor) Profuse sweating.
The riled up nerves, discomfort, anxiety, excitement, and perspiration on performance day match the state of Scott today. Once again, excitement dominates by far.

Briefing

First of all, allow me to thank my two faithful blog readers who have labeled themselves "followers" for their silent presence. The change from 0 to 1 follower was a big step away from e-loneliness. To double that--a 100% increase--is beautiful. Thank you readers. Read on.

Solve this puzzle: In almost exactly one week from now, I will be a changed person, but I won't change much about me. First person to chew on that and spit out the right answer wins pride points.

For your curiosity, here are FIVE INTERESTING FACTS about our friends THE BRITISH, and A CITY CALLED LONDON:
1) The approximate longitudinal change between Saint Paul, MN and London, UK is 92.6 degrees. Yep.
2) The British DO speak english. An older man recently asked me, "Now, don't they speak another language over in London?" To back him up, the British certainly have a set of vocabulary different from America's, and there's slang usage. But it's still english.
3) If you want to make money or volunteer, you need a UK visa. I spent many hours this summer shuffling through papers and e-booklets trying to figure out UK's new visa application process.
4) London Stone. Legend has it that a character named Brutus was told by a goddess to travel from Athens to what is now London and found the city. He brought with him a stone made of oolite called the "London Stone". As long as the stone is protected, the city of London thrives. I will find this stone.
5) Benjamin Franklin lived a good chunk of his life in London on Craven Street near parliament.

Toodles.

A Story without Polyester Shrinks Like 100% Cotton: Theory Behind The Rhudabega

I confess, I accidentally crossed the invisible double yellow lines and bumped into this guy at Target. A bit rough-hewn, he was. Scraggly hair, jaw clenched, shirt sleeves rolled up. One hand clenched a shopping basket and swung furiously as he raced mom-with-stroller to the express check-out lane.

He stops and asks me, “WTF?!” but continues walking before I could work up an adequate response to an inquiry with so many applications.

WTF?!

I can only assume he was referring to The Rhudabega and my intentions behind it. Let me keep this short and sweet:

The Rhudabega is truth with a bit of synthetic fabric woven in.
It’s your entertainment and my outlet. Follow my
imagination, my London experiences, and enjoy.

OLD LADY SUCCUMBS TO LOVE'S ALLURING FORCE, CRASHES INTO SIDE OF TRUCK

SAINT PAUL, MINNESOTA -- Cupid's potent arrows, normally prominent around St. Valentine's Day, nearly drove 89-year-old Evelyn Alva Murphy to her death bed on Monday afternoon. Reportedly overtaken by emotion after making brief eye contact with a younger male driver, Murphy accelerated into the side of the man's truck. The accident resulted in minor damage to truck and severe surficial scrapes to Murphy’s 1992 Buick LaSabre.

When asked about the crash, Murphy neglected to provide details beyond the emotional override. “I felt like I was 35 again! He looks like Humphrey Bogart, don’t you think?”

Despite the estimated $2500 in damages, Murphy appeared to reach a state of euphoria when the 29-year-old Tom Brunswick gave Murphy his phone number in the exchange of information.

“What? Is she a cougar?” Brunswick responded to the elderly woman’s actions. He declined to comment further.

White Guy Says He also Enjoys "Beat Down Low" and "Top 'lit' Back"

SAINT PAUL, MINNESOTA -- Local white guy and Parks mower Scott Hansen professes his likeness and respect for rap artist, producer, and record executive Clifford Harris, Jr, better known as T.I. "He's ma boi", Hansen shouted giddily early Tuesday morning while attending to his trash duties at the local park.

Long, quite days at work and an iPod playlist devoted to T.I.'s top ranked hits led the 20 year-old to realize the common ground shared by the indebted college student and the multi-millionaire star. "Well, I realized our tightness after listening to 'Top Back' for, like, the hundredth time", Hansen explains. "Just like T.I., I also enjoy my beat down low and my top 'lit' back."

Among his favorite T.I. tunes are "Whatever You Like", "Top Back", "What You Know", and "Why You Wanna", from the acclaimed King and Paper Trail albums.

When asked if he had "stacks on deck, Patron on ice" just like his role model, Hansen admitted he did not know what Patron was, but pointed to the trash bucket and pickers and said payroll would mail his "stacks" to him by Friday.

Hansen is also a self-purported fan of Simon and Garfunkle, acoustic tracks, and "pretty much everything on earth except polka--I don't care for polka".

Hansen is leaving at the end of August to study abroad in London for four months. He hopes to spread the "T.I. love".